ehh, why not?

7 things I plan to do before I die:
1). have friendly, beautiful, polite, intelligent babies/children
2). write a novel
3). see more of the world
4). learn how to play an instrument (preferably the piano)
5). be able to buy my mother something outrageously expensive just for the sake of buying it, not because she needs something.
6). be content with what i am doing and actually truly enjoy 9-5 (or whatever shift that dream job may be)
7). be able to speak malayalam fluently/correctly or win the lottery;)

7 things I can do:
1). cook a gourmet meal!
2). make people laugh and/or smile
3). live alone and love it!
4). make new friends in any situation
5). make a dirty house spotless in about an hour (cleaning nina= cleaning nazi!!)
6). sleep thru anything/ a whole day if no one bothered me
7). remember almost every important date, i.e birthdays, anniversaries, etc.

7 things I cannot do:
1). wake up in the am
2). give up an argument quickly
3). sing/dance in public without feeling awkward
4). do my hair with ease
5). stay focused at anything for more than 30 mins
6). keep up with my email/phone correspondence well
7). let go of rude/ignorant comments that invade my every thought for weeks after the fact.

7 things that attract me to another person:
1). smile
2). sense of humor
3). intelligent
4). thoughtfulness/big heart
5). pride in himself and his surroundings
6). strong, both physically and emotionally
7). british accents ( sorry, toby!)

7 things that I say most often:
1). i mean...
2). ohmigosh
3). yes, please!
4). have you ever??
5). whats happening (to you)?
6). whatever (no valley accent!)
7). various expletives

7 People I want to do this:
1). flog girls!
2). lisa
3). rajvi
4). betsy
5). michelle
6). ashton
7). toby

the road less travelled...

has anyone never decided to do something that they are not 100 percent on for some reason, but still are compelled to keep going? this is my current situation and as it may be a lil exciting, it sure is scary.

some of you may know already to what i'm referring to, and those who don't, sorry, i'm not getting into all that hassle right now for everyone to read. but i'm faced with decisions and stances that i am unsure of how to handle. i'm trying to think of where to pull more strength from. you think you can handle only so much and then somehow, you find just a little bit more in some dark corner of yourself. i consider myself lucky that i have always been able to find some more strength rather than a panic attack or a mental breakdown of some kind.

i know i have some friends also that are going through their own personal hells, again, i'm not going to be the one to put their business out on the street, but i know they also are wondering why their are going through such hardships and what they mean and how to go forward with the things they know now.

maybe life is set up this way. God puts you through these tests and tribulations to truly make you stronger, wiser and better for the hassles you must go through to get where you ultimately want to be.

i guess i maybe writing this to reassure myself during some very trying times. but then, if anyone has advice on how to know they are making the right decisions, please pass on some knowledge, because i need it badly!!